for my final trick, i shall turn into a disappointment
i’m laughinf so hard i cnat breathe
i came into this world covered in someone else’s blood and screaming and lemme tell you i’m not afraid to leave it the same way
What are your top beauty tips?
Start out perfect and don’t change a thing. Always accentuate your best features by pointing at them. And conceal your flaws by sucker punching anyone who has the audacity to mention them.
Never too old to learn from the Muppets.
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.” - Miss Piggy
i feel it in my bones, i’m on F I R E
hit the reblog so fast i think i broke my mouse
holY F U cKKKKkKKKkkkkkKKKKK
do you ever wake up angry about something
i just so love when people on tumblr ask for movie suggestions. it’s my time to shine.
"hey you all what’s your favorite movie?"
"hey im bored and i feel like watching a movie about friendship"
"hey you all im thinking of watching an interesting movie and—"
"i want to see a cheerful movie with rainbows and kittens and love and what will make me happy and—"
Yes Ron cover your boobs because you’re a girl
He’s also wearing a shirt
Guys… he lived with the goddamn Twins for YEARS, that’s probably an instinctive ‘Please don’t throw an experimental potion or giant spider on me’ reaction…
…at least he’ll never have that problem again…
Look me in the eye and tell me that was really necessary
NOT EVEN IN THE HARRY POTTER FANDOM AND THAT WAS A DOUCHE MOVE
how are you not in the fandom
i thought everyone was in the fandom
here give me your clothes no one is free of the fandom NO ONE
one time a white student from the university in my home town was talking to a student that came from africa to study and said “wow growing up in africa must have been so tough for you” and he just replied “my family could buy you” and walked away
how big is ur penis?? i don’t want length, i want volume, surface area and density
"Weren’t we going to explore the outside world? Far, far beyond these walls… to the burning water and the land of ice, to the snowfields of sand. To that world my parents were always hoping to see… Isn’t that the dream we both shared?"
do you ever just replay a video game and go
"how the hell did i defeat this boss the first time"